Not talkin' about the Cubs today

Seriously.
Last week I heard Peter Gammons on ESPN radio say something like, "Did Aramis Ramirez retire?"
Anyway, not talking about it.

Here's a story of the best commercial production prank you'll ever read.

I've done lots of commercials over my career, and when you go to another country, ANY damn thing can happen. Different cultures, different languages...it's all just different.
One time in China, an assistant took a polaroid of what was supposed to be our location. It was a living room, and she didn't realize that the urns on the shelf contained the remains of someone's ancestors, and I guess you're not supposed to take pictures of that.
The guy who owned the house went ballistic and...we weren't able to shoot there. 

The beginning of any good prank must have a set-up.
Before we even left, our producer/prankster Di explained to me that when shooting in Marrakesh, we would have to be very sensitive to the local culture there. Like, we may have to dress a certain way to get into certain parts of the city... 

So to get you in the mood, here are some shots of a very different culture, where said prank took place.

My suitcase.

"Gilligan's Island" about 4am on the flight. Awesome.

Shot from the roof of our hotel.

Snake charmers in a market.

At a market. Astonishingly beautiful.

There was a Prince or something behind this gate, and those guys weren't joking around when they indicated we should keep moving.

 

Not that hard to pretend you're a photographer for National Geographic here.

Pretty sure that's lamb.

So anyway, when you go shoot in other countries, you hire a local production company to assist your director and his team. They know locations and all that stuff. 
This company was called Dune Films, and they assisted on movies like "Babel".
The night before we're to do our casting, a producer tells us that tomorrow we'll be casting in a very culturally sensitive part of the city, where anything Western would be frowned upon.  
He wasn't sure, but there may be some clothing waiting for us in our rooms at the hotel.
I got back and here's the note I found (btw, I take photos of everything):

And next to this note was this pile of clothing:

So in the morning, I'm having breakfast with Bill, the group creative director.
Literally, I said something like, "Pass the salt" and he went goofy with laughter.
I simply thought I must be particularly funny.
The director and his producer were at another table, kind of hiding behind a giant plant.
So, they wanted privacy I guess.

Now it's about 15 minutes before the van is gonna leave, and I'm looking at this pile of clothes.
I call Bill, "Are you gonna put this stuff on now or wait til we get there?"
Giant laugh, which should have at least set off an alarm, and then "...Now."

Whatever man, this is for the greater good of the shoot and I am part of a team, right?

So the pants are very square and designed so that when they're all the way pulled up, the legs meet about mid-thigh.
There are thin white socks, a long sleeve white shirt, a pullover white robe that goes over it all, a fes (hat), and these long, pointed yellow shoes.
These shoes - the heel was folded down so they were meant to be worn like clogs, but they just fell off so I "broke" them by unfolding the heel. 
But when I walked, they'd fall off the back and the bottoms made a loud clacking sound, which is one of the reasons everyone in the hotel turned to stare.

The hotel was designed so you had to walk thru this restaurant area, down a long dark hall, then into the lobby.
The guests here all stared at me like, "What the hell, man?" while the people who lived here...one even touched my robe and sincerely said, "Very nice!"

So I get to the lobby and nobody's there.
I panic, sitting on a bench.
The most uncool thing you can do while on production is be late, and I'm thinking I CAN'T be late, right?
I walk up to the front desk, and idiotically say this to the Moroccan woman who speaks French: "Ummm, did you see a bunch of people who...look like me (pointing at my face), but are also dressed like this (pointing at my robes)."
She and the rest of the crew there all guffawed, which made me kinda nervous.
But she said "no".

So now I'm having a heart attack thinking maybe I missed the freaking van, when the producer sticks her head in the front door and yells, "EVERYONE'S WAITING!"

I regain my composure and walk out onto the street.
I look like this:

And unfortunately for me, this is a still from the video (not sharing, sorry) that the director shot as I walked to the van, saw that no one else had on these clothes, registered the collective laughing and realized I'd been had.

I was so much in shock I actually got in the van and we drove all the way to the casting with me pretty much using every bad word you can say. 

But the depth of prank, starting from well before we got on a plane, planned so well that everyone at the agency and client knew about it - it was all done so well that I couldn't even get mad.
Just a brilliant use of the location.

Once we got to casting, it turned out we were way early so I had the Moroccan driver take me back to the hotel to change.
I'm sitting in the front seat next to him and he says nothing and I figure maybe doesn't speak English, which is when I realize he's just trying to hold in his laughter, which is when he says, "BWAHHH HA HA GOOD JOKE WAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Anyway, I hope this story was better than talking about another miserable loss to the Pittsburgh Pirates.

And the shoot went great, by the way.

Completely crazy (can you spot the director of photography?), but went well.

 

 

Comments

[DotMom]

Oh my gosh, Tim. That was WAY better than the game yesterday! Way. bwah ha ha ha hahahahahahah

[Tim@Cubby Blue]

DotMom!
HA.

I thought so too.
Good to hear from you.

[DotMom]

I haven't been reading much here ... the Cubs are too depressing. I actually watched the finale of The Biggest Loser the other night instead of the Cubs game. I figured: What's the difference? **shrug**

[Rich Beckman]

Great story!

Nice job showing the culture clash.

I'm guessing the guy by the camera, blue shirt, baseball cap.

[Tim@Cubby Blue]

You can see it in the stands.
You can hear it in the hallways.
Its just not good right now.

[Tim@Cubby Blue]

Hes the assistant.
Guy behind him is actually looking in the lens..

[DotMom]

Now you're just teasing me.

[Donna]

Fabulous story, Tim. Like you said, how can you get mad at something so brilliant? I'm actually going to the game today. Dempster is pitching and I think Soto is going to be back. There's something to be hopeful about. Time magazine has an article about the science of optimism this week. Guess I need to read it. Can you imagine how depressing it will be if we get swept by the PIRATES?!

[Tim@Cubby Blue]

Im lookin out my window right now, and all I can say is im so sorry you went down there.
And I hope they call it and dont start up with Demp and have to delay and waste his start, because hes about all weve got.

Now, Im looking for optimism!

[DB]

FEZ

[_linton]

I am laughing so hard right now! Please Please Please post the video!!! amazing!

[Tim@Cubby Blue]

Mr. Linton!
Actually, I have a dvd for you.
You just cant show it to anyone.

[Tim@Cubby Blue]

Did I speel it rong?