This is a true story, but I'm changing the name of "Scott Andrews" 'cause I lost touch with the guy and can't ask permission to use his name.
Also, some bad language in here, so be warned.
Remember that movie "The Babe" - the one starring John Goodman as Babe Ruth?
There was this guy, Scott Andrews, who used to hang out at Jake's Pub and we were kinda bar-friends there, and also he was in the film biz.
He was a location scout mostly for commercial productions, but he got attached to this big-time "The Babe" movie, part of which was being filmed at Wrigley Field.
He invited me to stop by on my way to work.
Now, it's been long enough that I don't remember the exact details, but I remember it was summer, the Cubs were out of town, and I was riding my bike to work that day.
I locked it up in front, and you could see hundreds of people dressed in clothing from Babe Ruth's time.
3 piece suits with derby's, fluffy dresses and hats and parasols.
I went up to this woman at a table who seemed to be in charge and told her I was a guest of Scott's.
She told me he was out on the field and pointed to where I should walk down.
She didn't say it was a tunnel to the dugout.
The one real players use.
She had no idea how FREAKING FREAKED OUT I FREAKING WAS TO BE FREAKING WALKING DOWN A TUNNEL TO THE ACTUAL FREAKING WRIGLEY FREAKING FIELD.
I was kinda floating down, marveling at the walls and thinking about Cub history.
Suddenly a guy comes running towards me, clearly agitated.
He points back down the tunnel and yells.
"DID YOU JUST TAKE A SHIT DOWN THERE?"
It was such a weird thing to say considering my almost religious state of mind.
"No. I..." and that's all I got out - he just ran by.
Then I started to smell something sort of awful, and right down at the bottom of the tunnel was this little room on the right. I don't think there was a door, but there was a toilet and someone had obviously done the deed I'd just been accused of.
But looking past that was... why there's the dugout.
It was the visitor's dugout, but still.
And just beyond that was the actual diya-mond.
I walked out onto Wrigley Field.
Where Ryno and Shawn Dunston and Mark Grace and Rick Sutcliffe played.
(Well, it was also where Hector Villanueva, Steve Wilson, and Gary Scott played but... don't wanna wreck the mood.)
So the sun was just coming up over the right field wall, and I am telling you it was gorgeous and I was on. the. field.
Sure enough, there's Scott standing in short center waving me over, but looking kinda concerned.
"This is so COOL!" I said.
Still with the look of concern he says, "Hey, just a minute" and he holds up the walkie talkie so I can listen to a voice saying, "Somebody took a damn SHIT in the prop tiolet! Hamm, take care of it."
Now Scott is kinda laughing as he explains: "They're gonna shoot a scene where The Babe (John Goodman) is REAL hungover, and he's supposed to lurch out of the dugout and go puke in the toilet, but it's a fake toilet and somebody took a shit in it."
Now I hear a voice on the walkie that must be Hamm.
"Flynn, get to the prop toilet and clean up that shit." he says.
"Ahh shit!" says Flynn, "Morgan, can you handle this shit problem?"
A couple more seconds, it's Morgan: "Johnson, get somebody to clean up that shit."
Now it's Johnson's turn.
"Scott, somebody's gotta clean up that shit."
Without missing a beat, Scott goes, "Roger that. Montagano, you heard about the shit problem, clean it up please."
And on down the line it went, until finally somebody actually had to clean it up.
Shit rolls downhill even at Wrigley Field.
Scott took me around the outfield, but it was obvious he was pretty busy.
I walked back through the stinky tunnel, got on my bike and went to work.
Later, people kinda didn't believe I'd actually been walking around on the grounds of Wrigley Field.
The Cubs are officially out of the Jake Peavy trade competition.
And believe me, Jason Marquis is SO relieved.
But maybe he shouldn't be...
Lou said all the right stuff to quash the rumor in Cubs.com yesterday, saying he's happy with the starters.
But then he did the classic, "HEY, LOOK OVER THERE!" distraction thing when out of nowhere he brought up outfielder Raul Ibanez: "Raul can hit, there's no question," Piniella told the newspaper. "He's a professional bat, and he's that type of hitter that we're alluding to. ... And he's a great guy, no question. I like the guy. He's a professional hitter; he plays hard; he's a good player."
Okay, so we're back to looking for a lefty bat, right?
Go read Barry Rozner in this morning's Daily Herald where he says, "In fact, the Cubs have become the leaders in the Peavy chase, mostly because Chicago is his first choice, and the Cubs might be the Padres' only option, according to sources close to the situation."
A rotation with Big Z, Harden, Dempster, Terrible Ted and Jake Peavy?
That kinda boggles the mind, plus it's way more fun talking about than Raul Whatshisname.
waiting to get a little time to read Cait Murphy’s excellent book, “Crazy '08: How
a cast of cranks, rogues, boneheads, and magnates created the greatest year in
the 1908 baseball season, and Cait has taken what must have been millions of
hours of research and she sort of effortlessly ties all the small stories of the
season all together into an easy reading, very funny and informative book.
about 1908, I thought it would be all Cubs, but it’s really about everything –
every team, the fringe characters, and just real stuff about the times.
hit you: “The causes of the panic might not sound obscure, but the consequences
were not. A committee tasked in 1908 with analyzing the events described what
happened: Two-thirds of the banks of the country [had] entered upon an
internecine struggle to obtain cash, had ceased to extend credit to their
customers, had suspended cash payments and were hoarding such money as they
had. What was the result?. . . Thousands of men were thrown out of work,
thousands of firms want into bankruptcy, the trade of the country came to a
standstill, and all this happened simply because the credit system of the
country had ceased to operate.”
That was a
hundred years ago.
get to meet the big players of the time – Honus Wagner, John McGraw, Tinkers
Evers & Chance… do you know who Frank Merkle was?
I didn’t – I
just got to this part.
centerpiece of perhaps the most controversial game ever played.
He made a
base-running boo boo that became known as “Merkle’s Boner”.
Why do you
Go get the
book and spend some quality winter time with a frosty cold one, your favorite
sport, and “Crazy '08”.
below is from when I started the book, on a plane. The guy in
front of me suddenly went full recline and invaded all my personal space,
forcing me to stare at his perfect part for almost the whole flight.
is an art blog following the Chicago Cubs with cartoons, gifs, animations, and illustrations by me, Tim Souers.
I began the illustrations in 2003 - you can find the links to the 2003 - 2006 seasons below.
2007 - present is in the regular archives.
Feel free to contact me at CubbyDashBlue(at)gmail(dot)com.
Thanks for visiting, and go Cubs.
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