So this art is from the game played on September 11, 2010, when Ryan Dempster got his 100th win.
Shamefully, he's only gotten 13 wins since that day.
I love math.
This is from Dempster's ESPN profile page:
Note how many games he's projected to win and lose.
Anyway, it's a day of great rejoicing and if I wasn't so busy I'd have tried to tie W #1 for Ryan in with the Diamond Julilee going on in England becuase man oh man, is that ever a big deal.
Here's what happened with the Cubs, and it was pretty good thinking.
See, Starlin Castro came up to bat and thought hey, if I get a hit maybe somebody will knock me in.
So he did.
And then David DeJesus thought you know, I'm not sure Yovani Gallardo has his best stuff, maybe I'll look at a few pitches and try to get on base with a walk and maybe somebody will knock me in.
Then Alfonso Soriano came up and saw that there were two men on base. He thought hey, if I hit the ball maybe I'll knock one of those guys in.
So he hit a homer and Dale Sveum thought wow that's cool, now maybe I can talk about something else after the game besides how awful my team is.
Good thinking all the way around.
Cubs 10 Brewers zeero.
Here's what happened to me.
Awhile ago we were in Orlando for a convention and some of us went to dinner.
Somebody got a steak and it came with this super cool steak knife about the size of a small machete with the serrated edge and everything.
I said, "That is one cool knife."
Then we came back to Chicago and one morning that same knife showed up on my desk.
One of my fellow diners had brought it back, so I put it in my backpack to bring home.
Everything was cool until the other day when the TSA lady at airport security asked me, "Do you have anything sharp or pointy in this backpack?"
And I say, "No".
And she says, "Oh yeah? WHAT ABOUT THIS?" as she pulled out that same knife which I'd completely forgotten about since it was buried with all my other crap at the bottom of my bag.
To see a knife of that size come out of your bag at airport security is kind of...shocking.
I laughed nervously and said, "Oh that. Ha ha. Well, I forgot it was in there so...can you just throw it away for me ha ha?"
But she didn't think it was funny and took my license and told me to take a seat.
"This knife is so big, I gotta call the cops." she said.
So the cops come, and I like the police, I really do.
I think they have one of the hardest jobs imagineable, and my neighbor is Garry the Cop, and he's smart and funny and very good with people and at his job.
But this one cop wasn't like Garry the Cop at all.
In fact, he said this to me: "So tell me. Have you by any chance ever HEARD about NINE ELEVEN? A day when terrorists ATTACKED OUR COUNTRY?"
It was sarcasm, pure and simple.
And yet, not the funny kind.
He informed me that they were gonna have to report it to the FAA, and the minimum fine was fifteen HUNDRED dollars.
I informed him that it was a big misunderstanding and that it was only a steak knife.
And I probably said, "I'm sorry" in there about ohhhh...15 times.
When they finally let me go, the other cop said they don't always fine people.
So maybe nothing will happen.
Then, I landed in Los Angeles and my wife called to say our garage was broken into and all the bikes were stolen.
Then, the Cubs got swept by the Giants.
So I'm pretty happy with Ryan Dempster's first win of 2012, and hoping that it chased away the dark cloud hanging over my head.