Actually, the Alfonso problem is probably down the list a bit, but I figured I'd bring it up because we're about to see mad contract stuff going on.
Albert Pujols, Prince Fielder come to mind.
You know what Alfonso's contract is?
Embarrassing, even though I'm removed from it, really.
You'll be having a normal conversation with someone about baseball, and suddenly That Contract comes up and it's like Arnold Schwarzenegger's maid's lovechild walked in the room.
Even though Little Arnold isn't yours, you just... you know...keep me away from that, okay?
Yeah, I know Alfonso got marginally better in left.
His arm is goofy but strong and accurate.
And one would expect a decline at the plate.
But here's the thing: his contract pays him 18 million dollars a season until 2014.
In dog years he's about 72 right now.
And I'm...well first I'm sorry to share my horrible feelings of dread with you.
But as a Cub Fan, like a dog I've been abused over the years and sometimes I'd rather hide under the couch.
Talk of the Cubs signing Pujols causes me to make a puddle on the carpet.
I know everybody likes Prince Fielder, and I do too.
Dale Sveum says he's an amazing athlete despite the pants size (I read he's currently listed at 5' 11" and 285 pounds).
He's 27, the perfect time to get him, but...the...body type...deteriorates...faster...
Yesterday somebody said, "Wouldn't it be great if the Cubs got Prince Fielder?"
All I could say was, "Bbbut..."
And then I blurted, "ALFONSO SORIANO!"
Sharing my angst.
Feel free to skewer me, but I can't help it.