Ahhh, this illustration's too mean. Especially considering I don't really know Kevin Millar.
He's...38 years old, bats righty, first baseman, last 3 seasons he's gone from .254 to .234 to .223, "similar batters" would include Jacque Jones. Somebody tell me an upside here. What kind of drawing am I supposed to do for this guy? Cub fans jumping up and down? Wooooo! Kevin Millar!
Maybe they really are scraping the bottom of the barrel.
Or maybe I'm just in a bad mood since I've had some kinda bug for the last week and our pal Reed Johnson's gonna go be a Dodger...
It sounds like Kevin's buddies with Ryan Dempster so maybe he's a good clubhouse guy, right?
Maybe a couple days ago Lou looked at his bench and thought..."Hoffpauir, Blanco, Fontenot, Colvin, Fuld... I NEED SOME OLD GUYS!"
In 2003 when Dusty got 36 year old Eric Karros I wasn't too excited. Then old Eric became a pretty important part of that team (I'd kill to see the video he shot of that season). Especially when young stud-at-the-time Hee-Seop Choi went down with the permanent headache after running into Kerry Wood... Which of course makes me think back to Most Consistent Cub of '09, Derrek Lee. Last season he had to take some almost-serious neck spasm time off for getting a love tap on his helmet from Angel Guzman (or was it just a rough slide into second?). That neck of his make you guys nervous?
Maybe Lou's just remembering when Aramis went down last year and he had to say out loud in front of everybody, "HEY MILES! Yeah you, tiny insignificant man with the toothpick-bat. GO PLAY THIRD." Not that Micah Hoffpauir is in Aaron's league, but maybe Lou doesn't want to find out the hard way... what if Micah's not the player up here he was in Iowa? (You won't find that out til Hof starts for... awhile.)
Ah whatever. It's just Hot Stove time, you never really know anything and the guy hasn't even signed a minor league contract.
I did have fun making the drawing, even if I couldn't figure out how to make it happen inside the barrel where we'd all expect to find somebody "scraping".
Anyway, I'm having a cold one right now, and here is my toast:
Here's to Reed Johnson. I hope Manny gets caught buying more woman-drugs to correct his man-parts and they take him out for a season so you get to start in Dodger Stadium and show 'em how to Play. The. Game.
