Cubby-Blue

Count to Ten, Carlos, or...

Look at what's going on in St. Louis, Carlos.
Jason Isringhausen not only has lost his touch, but is now on the DL for reacting "angrily after last Friday's game, when he blew a 2-0 lead with two out in the bottom of the ninth at Milwaukee. He twice delivered open-handed blows to a television set in the clubhouse after the 3-2 loss."
This wasn't self-inflicted, but Rick Ankiel swung a bat so hard something popped in his shoulder (read about it at St. Louis Today Sports).
Be happy you haven't hurt yourself with the breaking a freaking bat over your knee thing yet.
Learn a technique to stop yourself from doing bad things.
Lots of guys have used the one above under equally important circumstances, and IT WORKS.
Okay, Cubs drop a dumb one to the Pirates 7-6, but I guess you can't...ah, you know what?
In the case of that particular team it should have been possible to win 'em all.
With Soriano this hot, at least.
The bottom of the 9th was almost amazing, with 2 outs and Alfonso down to the last strike but hitting a double, Theriot getting a hit, and D. Lee hitting it to the warning track...

Oh well, into the office and then out to Wrigley with the kids and Jason Marquis on the mound.
I didn't want to say this out loud, and I can't even remember who the pitcher was, but last year when Alfonso got hot like this, somebody plunked him pretty good and he cooled off immediately.
Please don't let that happen...

The Chicago Cubs Hot Test

They measure the hotness of chili peppers with "Scoville Units".
With Chicago Cub Left Fielders, they measure hotness with "home runs".
Alfonso Soriano hit 2 leadoff homers against the Padres, and then he hit one again today against the Pirates.
And then he hit a homer in the second inning, in case you didn't think he was hot enough.
Oh yeah, I remember this.
It's that Alfonso Soriano, and when he gets hot it's hell for the other team.
I saw the second homer on my Pete Taylor-rigged tv in my office, people looking in from the hall.

It's not even June so yeah I'm speaking out of turn here (but then again with the Cubs you NEVER get to speak out of turn like this): the Cubs are really good.
Real pitching, real hitting, real relief (leave Bob Howry alone - the guy's a stud and he'll come around).
They didn't see Brandon Webb during their sweep of the Best in the West Diamondbacks, but damn!
They swept those guys.
Young Sean Gallagher got his first major league win today...did you see Mark DeRosa's crashing catch against the ivy?
It's a really cool time to be in Chicago.
Weather's turning nice, people are turning friendly, the trees have grown those green things on the branches...umm...you know those things...leaves.
I'm taking the kids to Wrigley on Sunday, and I will douse my dog with jalapenos if Alfonso leads off with a homer.
Can't wait.

Jim Edmonds in a Cub Uniform

Strange.
Unusual.
Weird.
Not Jim McMahon in a Packer uniform weird, but maybe more like Jim McMahon with a beer gut wearing nothing but a speedo on a riding lawn mower on tv weird (did anybody else see that last year? My GOD).
I didn't see the game.
I saw a photo of Jim Edmonds in a Cubs uniform.
I could have done a Salvadore Dali thing here, but the experience wasn't surreal.
It was weird, like Picasso.
But like old Jimbo the Packer, I'll get used to it.
I guess Ryan Dempster out-Madduxed Maddux and the Cubs take 3 of 4 from the Pads.
First place by a game and a half over...Houston?
Whatever.
Closer problems in St. Louis and Milwaukee, I guess.
It's a beautiful day in Chicago, supposed to be 70 with the Pirates coming to town.
Go Cubs.
And Jim Edmonds, we'll get used to you.

ps: I just fudged with Photoshop over the top of that Picasso, then put my name on it.
Kinda cheating...

When Geovany Soto Connects...

I heard his homer on Emily's radio in my office.
Heard the score, heard Lilly had a rough inning but otherwise was completely out-pitching an off Jake Peavy, and I heard Alfonso led off with another homer for the second straight day.
Then I had to turn off the radio.
Busy.
But I've been meaning to do a Soto painting because this guy is special.
Not just because he's (no offense, Kosuke, but you've got too much experience to be a rookie to me) a legit rookie of the year candidate, but because he's a bonafide Cub.
(Heh, I said "bona".)
I kinda try to pay attention to the Cub's system and they do have big names in there, but last year it was like poof: one day this guy I never heard of came up and just took the damn position.
It's the toughest one physically and on the other side - think of all the guys he works with from Carlos Zambrano to Rich Hill. That cannot be easy.
Plus, maybe it's the way he's shaped or moves or something, but there's a little caveman in his swing.
I like that.

Soriano is going to wreck every other team's fun for awhile, and I'm ashamed of myself for forgetting what he's like when he does this.
Even with half a leg he's terrifying, and that's beautiful.

Lastly, Jim Edmonds.
Pretty sure you'll read all kinds of angry stuff everywhere about this.
The guy I'm mad at?
Felix.
Because the shame in this whole mess is that Felix just didn't get the job done.
He's not done yet, but dammit anyway.
So, I'm holding my tongue about Edmonds and we'll see what happens.

ps: Welcome Micah Hoffpauir.

Reminder

This painting is from 2003, when the Cubs lost 2 of 3 to the Pads in San Diego.
Many of you don't remember 1984.
I barely do, but that's probably from inhaling all that spray glue in the mount room while making storyboards back then.
I sold my first commercial for a quickly-dead cereal called Fruit and Bran Wheaties.
So I was nearing the end of the shoot in Los Angeles when this 5-game series began.
At night, I'd watch the news and see how Chicago was going CRAZY as the Cubs won the first two games big.
Pretty bummed I wasn't there.
Then they lost one.
Then, I flew home.
Back then, you could ask the "stewardess" to ask the pilot to find out the score on his radio, and then he'd announce it.
And he said something like, "This is the Captain speaking. Some idiot asked if the Cubs won. No."
Next day I watched game 5 in some bar on Lincoln.
Just awful.

Besides Steve Garvey and '84, the Pads have owned the Cubs the last couple years.
So when the Cubs pour it on the San Diego Padres, do not say, "Ohh, I wish they'd save some of these runs for later."
I say run that score up high as you possibly can.
12 to 3?
That's all?
Well, I guess I'll take it.

ps: Alfonso Soriano. Yep, he's started a hot streak. Hope it goes for a looong time.

Kosuke Fukudome At The Plate

Okay, it's the bottom of the 8th inning in a 4-4 tie game between the Cubs and Diamondbacks.
Aramis Ramirez has just smoked a single off Tony Pena, and now Kosuke Fukudome is up.
Pretend you're Diamondback 3rd baseman Mike Reynolds.
For SURE Fukudome's gonna bunt to get Aramis in scoring position, but did you see him mash that homer through the crosswind yesterday?
Fukudome has...power.
What if he decides to do that crazy late swat that means a line drive over my head or...at my nose?
DAMMIT, Aramis steals second.
That's just great.
Now what?
Probably he'll swing now, right?
RIGHT?
NOOOOO! BUNNNNNTTTTT!

I hear that play on the radio in the Jewel parking lot.
Sitting here, motor running, not going in just in yet.
It's Mother's Day, I'm happily buying stuff for a special dinner.
But I'm thinking...what must other teams think about Kosuke Fukudome?
He's gotta scare the BeJesus out of people.

So he bunts and...goes to second on a Soto grounder.
Then for the second day in a row Daryle Ward, like a God, comes thru in the clutch with the 2 run double.
And it's over with Kerry Wood and the 9-pitch 9th.

Sweep.

I go buy groceries.

There are guys on this team who scare you with...well, like Aramis Ramirez has got crazy power and I'm not sure I've ever seen him swing any way but hard as he can.
Kosuke Fukudome, however - he's a guy with lots of different punches, and he's always thinking about which one to use because he can.
Never seen a Cub like him.
I still don't want to expect too much of him.

Guess I'm playing right into his hand.

Alfonso "Crazy Legs" Soriano

"I don't know how any Cub fans can get down on Alfonso Soriano. He's the most entertaining player in the game."
Alfonso swings at a pitch about 50 feet outside.
"See?"
That came from the mouth of Red Sox fan John Hart.
Me, John and Sutter were up in our seats down the right field line, and just then Soriano gets another hit.
Then Theriot hits one to DBack rightfielder Justin Upton.
I'm watching the ball, Upton fumbles with it, then out of the corner of my eye something is wrong.
Soriano is running a crazy sort of speeding up and slowing down run - a very odd gait - and he goes right around 3rd base and I look and it's Augie Ojeda at second with the ball RIGHT THERE and OH GOD SORIANO'S DIVING HEAD FIRST AND HE'S SOOOO OUT but the catcher drops the ball.
Insane.
"What did I tell you?", Hart again.
Dempster is so good I can't believe it - this is the Diamondbacks, and the only guy doing damage is...Augie Ojeda.
But when he leaves, it's because he's just given up a couple runs and the Cubs are down 2-1.
Then, the 6 run 7th with Ward's gorgeous hit and Fukudome's homer...
Then in the 8th I get a text from Olson, who has amazing seats so we sneak down.
You guys know what shooting with a crappy point and shoot digital camera is like - you push the button and a half hour later the thing actually takes the photo.
I got this one of Soriano getting his 4th hit.

Impossible, right?
That streak of white is the ball.

So, fabulous game.
Cubs could sweep today, this Mother's Day 2008.
Zambrano vs. Randy Big Unit Johnson.
But it's raining outside, and it's a quarter to 1 right...now.
They'll try to get it in, but it's pretty ugly out there.

Anyway, I have to agree with Mr. Hart.
Alfonso just might be the most entertaining player out there.
And this might just be the beginning of one of his patented tears.
Hope so.

Ted Lilly - The Lilly of the Rally

I have a tv in my office.
It's for looking at director's reels - hooked up to a dvd player - and I've never even thought about it as a...tv set.
Pete Taylor comes in, "You should put an antenna on that thing."
What?
He comes back in a little bit with a piece of telephone wire, and Presto MacGyver!
WGN comes on.
I didn't even want to know I could do this.
I marvel for a minute, but it's pretty busy so I turn back around (the tv is behind my desk) and turn off the sound so I'm not so distracted.
But out of the corner of my eye I think I just saw...did Ted Lilly just get a hit and knock in a run?
MY GOD HE DID!
And now Soriano...HE SMACKS A DOUBLE and scores Reed Johnson.
Cubs are up 2-1 in the 6th!
This is against the cherry-red-hot-first-place Diamondbacks, and seriously I was trying not to pay attention. Didn't feel good about this one with that Dan Haran guy shutting down the National League.
Then Derrek Lee hits a homer off ex Cub Juan Cruz, and Kerry Wood comes in and I believe gets the last three outs in 9 pitches.
Cubs 3 Dbacks 1.
And Ted Lilly gave up one run and 3 hits over 7 innings AND gets the big RBI with the game tied.
Truly, the Lilly of the Rally.

Lou's Gonna Tinker

Did the Cubs spring a leak?
Blow a gasket or something?
Lou's gonna fix it.
The big rumor in the paper this morning is Felix will go back down and a guy named Andres Torres comes up.
Plays center.
I guess Andres is pretty hot in the minors with a 23 game hitting streak.
I wish I could say, "Well, that'll certainly help Felix."
But I can't.
If he goes down, he'll hit .350 or whatever and be the Minor League God he's already proved himself to be.
I hope he doesn't (I wish he'd just start to hit), but Lou's gonna do what he's gonna do.

Well, lets see what happens with that and any other changes that might happen.
Eyre's almost here so more room will have to be made...
Whatever.
Today is Dan Haren and the first place Diamondbacks.
It's just not gonna get any easier this weekend.
I'm gonna go.
See you at Wrigley.

The Bipolar Bats of the Chicago Cubs

You bet it's a crazy season.
Reds 9 Cubs zeerow.
Huh?
Lieber gives up 4 homers in one inning?
Another one of those days I guess.
But Lou's tinkering, and it did get a whole lot better last year when he did that.
I just figured he figured they were more figured out.
But there you go.
The Cubs get a couple days to re-group before the 22-11 Arizona Diamondbacks come to town.
If there's a silver lining in this last stretch of pain, it's that the Cubs surely haven't peaked yet.
And it's never good to peak too early, right?
Okay, get to the store and buy some freaking plants and have FUN gardening dammit.
No matter how bad you feel right now, it'll get better.
Promise.